When I began this journey and started writing out all of my thoughts , I was conflicted. Who would be my target audience? What will I say ? How will I send this message in the most unbiased way possible ? Then it hit me . Stop worrying and say whats in your heart . Unknowingly , I began to do some digging , searching for my purpose and how it would matter to anyone .
December 27, 2012 - I watched all of my permed hair fall to the floor ...which was literally all of it.
This was , and still is the most memorable day of my life. I'd been stressed and for some reason , i felt that hair was what held me back from moving forward. Sure , it was the style at the time and I wanted to fit in , but it was more than just a trend to me. This was only the beginning of my depression . I needed to free myself of all the impurities that i'd let in my life and now looking back , I realized that i was crying for help. I was always such a strong person , always encouraging others and keeping a smile on my face by any means necessary but I had reached my tipping point.
There I was thinking that I would be free when I left the chair , but no . The smack in the face that I received from others for doing something that wasn't all that normal for a high school junior and the stepchild of a church elder was unbearable. I let the words and standoff-ish attitudes push me further and further into my feelings of self-hate. I blamed myself for everything that was happening in my life and in my heart , with nowhere to truly turn. I was ridiculed for a decision that I thought would be freeing . Comments such as , " your hair is your glory" , were always spat at me and it pushed me so far to the edge that I almost broke down.
Thank goodness I found peace in myself . Through all that I went through , I somehow figured out how to forgive others and myself , speak up on things that bother me , and to discontinue the habit of taking other people's mess. In doing so , I became so comfortable with myself and embarked on a new journey towards loving Michelle .
Today I am doing what I feel is best for me , saying whats on my mind and making decisions that will secure MY happiness . I've learned that my hair was not my glory , my story is. Sometimes in life we go through things that are created to break us , but we forget the power that we have. During the time that I built this site , I realized that my purpose in life was to fight . I am a fighter , a warrior . I've successfully and will continually fight through life's adversities and embrace change ...because change is good even when it seems bad.
Through these struggles and realizations , the phrase Never Stop Evolving , was developed and it makes me very proud that it is my own. It says so much about my journey to loving myself and accepting the trials that came to make me who I am today. I cannot believe how much 3 words has changed my life and how passionate I became at only 18 years old about this. Never Stop Evolving isn't just some catchy phrase , it is the lifestyle that I live. Make it yours.